A rancher from Central Arizona died and went on to the Great Beyond. As he
approached the great gate, he noticed that the terrain was bare with no
greenery. He remarked to the gate keeper, "Howdy Saint Peter. Say, this
looks just like Arizona." "The gatekeeper replied, "First of all, I'm not
Saint Peter...and second, you really don't know where you are at all, do
you?"

Difference

Said the FBI agent to the bank teller after the bank was robbed for the third time by the same bandit, "Did you notice anything special about the man?"

Pizza Delivery

A college pizza delivery boy arrived at the house of Larry Johnson. He delivered the pizza to his trailer. After giving it to him, Larry asked: "What is the usual tip?"

"Well," replied the youth, "this is my first trip here, but the other guys say if I get a quarter out of you, I'll be doing great." "Is that so?" snorted Larry. "Well, just to show them how wrong they are, here's five dollars."

"Thanks," replied the youth, "I'll put this in my school fund."

"What are you studying in school?" asked Larry.

The lad smiled and said: "Applied psychology."

Asking for Viagra

A middle aged man, about 5 foot 8 inches tall, walks into a Walmart
and asks where the pharmacy counter is. He is directed to it.
When he reaches it, he asks to see the pharmacist.
The pharmacist comes and the man, looking around furtively, asks
quietly, "Do you sell Viagra here?"
The pharmacist answers firmly, "Yes, sir. We certainly do."
The man then asks, "Do you think I could get it over the counter?"
The pharmacist thinks for a moment and then says, "Perhaps, if you took
five or six pills at once you might."

Mistake

A cop pulls a young guy over:
"Hello officer" said the smart aleck kid.
"Young man did you see that stop sign?" asked the cop.
Yup, but I didn't see you!